11/08/2013: Fairbanks man shot in the leg
November 15, 2013


We need more guns so that the guy who was shot in the leg could shoot himself, or the other guy, or someone else, because more people shooting more people is only settled by having more people shoot more people.  Absolute madness.

10/20/2013: Fairbanks man is now dead.
October 21, 2013


It’s weird, because Mr. Patton was alive the moment before someone went through the following thought process:  “hey, here’s a handgun.  Let’s use it on this person and make them dead instead of alive.”

10/20/2013: Human Being is dead because we don’t have enough guns
October 20, 2013


Yesterday, this human being was walking the earth as a living entity.  Today, they are dead.  And it is very clearly because we need more guns as more guns makes more shooting less likely, not more likely.  It’s true, because that’s what the NRA tells us, and they have guns, so it’s true.  But we need more guns.  More guns = more truth.  It’s written in the bible, I’m pretty sure.

10/20/2013: Two shot in Jewel Lake at a “party”
October 20, 2013

Clearly, more guns are needed, because the ones we have right now are not enough.  We need more guns.  That would solve the problem of death and injury by gunshot.


10/17/2013: Gun owner uses his gun on Thursday
October 19, 2013


The day before, on Wednesday, the NRA was arguing that this man should own a gun.  On Thursday, the man used the gun.  He started off using it to hold his girlfriend against her will.  Then there were a couple of shots, and now they are both dead.  Thanks, NRA!

10/09/2013: Gun owner uses gun to make crime easier
October 14, 2013


It’s neat that so many people (gun owners) work really hard to make sure that guns are available to everyone!  Think what would happen if there weren’t any guns–I mean, there might not be any guns.  We can’t have that!

1/01/2013: Anchorage criminal made more brazen with gun availability
January 4, 2013


Criminals love guns.  It makes their job easier.  That gun you might own?  If you’re a responsible gun owner, you’ll have it locked up, ammo stored separately, so it’s almost impossible for you to ever get to it if you needed it.  AND, your gun is a nice little score for a criminal, so it can actually ATTRACT them.  See how you’ve made society worse by choosing to own a gun?  See story.  Yay guns!

11/16/2012: Gun shoots one man, makes rape easier to commit, then suicide follows
November 17, 2012


What part of this did the weapon make better?  It certainly made it easy to shoot the boyfriend, the threat of using it against the woman certainly made the raping easier to commit, and then it certainly made it easier for the criminal to kill himself.  Look at the cost.  How anyone can justify gun ownership is simply stunning.

10/15/2012: Sorry I used your gun to shoot you accidentally and kill you, Daddy
November 17, 2012

Gee, just think what would have happened if this family didn’t own a gun.  Might the Dad still be alive?  Yes.  He would be.  But because someone chose to own a gun, the father is dead.  Blood is on the hands of everyone who owns a gun–you contribute to this.  You made it easier for this to happen with your gun demand.

10/28/2012: Anchorage man shot and killed by someone with a gun
October 28, 2012


This man is dead because guns make it very easy to kill people.  That is why guns were invented.  Guns are inexpensive and available to nearly everyone in the U.S. because of fear-driven demand.  If there were no demand for guns in the U.S., there would be nearly nobody making guns, and the few that were made would likely be quite expensive.  But thanks to the NRA fear factory and the very stupid people who give them money, we have demand, cheap guns and poor gun laws.  And now there is another dead Alaskan to add to the long list of dead Alaskans who were in the way of a gun owner’s bullet.